Pastor Mike Meinema & Worship Pastor Tom Lowen of Southridge Community Church
For nine years, I attended and served at Southridge Community Church. I was deeply involved, joining a life group, leading the coffee ministry, helping with setup, and playing on the Sunday worship team. It was my attempt to find healing and community after nearly two decades of turmoil at Wellspring Community Church.
My wife and I were desperately searching for a place where we could heal after the severe trauma we experienced at Wellspring, largely due to the actions of Marc Brulé and Andrew Thompson. While Marc and Andrew were brothers-in-law, Andrew’s brand of narcissism was particularly insidious–hidden beneath a polished exterior.
Unfortunately, Southridge was not the refuge we had hoped for. Little did I know that Andrew’s music mentor, Tom Lowen, was the worship pastor at Southridge–a man whose judgmental nature and relentless demand for perfection set the tone for what was to come. Southridge would not only be the last church I attended but the place where I fell away from faith in Jesus Christ altogether.
A Church Should Be a Safe Place
As a believer, you don’t expect to encounter social injustice or a complete lack of mercy in the church. It’s supposed to be the safest place in the world. What harm could possibly come to you there?
But if you struggle with mental illness, require medication, or need support, be warned: the harm can be devastating. For me, the actions of Southridge’s leadership nearly cost me my life.
I became suicidal for over two years after leaving Southridge. It started when Pastor Mike Meinema and Worship Pastor Tom Lowen responded to yet another false accusation–likely rooted in Andrew Thompson’s influence–with no mercy or opportunity for me to defend myself. They removed me from the worship team in front of the entire congregation during a Sunday service.
Begging for Mercy
I had never begged for mercy in my life until that day. With two friends present, I pleaded with Tom and Mike, explaining that I was not emotionally equipped to handle what they were doing. My mental health was already fragile, and their public dismissal left me utterly broken.
Instead of offering understanding or support, they doubled down on their judgment. I was given no benefit of the doubt and no opportunity to explain myself. Their actions triggered a complete nervous breakdown, leaving me in trauma therapy for two years–a therapy I barely survived due to the excruciating two-year waitlist.
A Cry for Help Ignored
I called Tom Lowen three times, begging him to help me navigate through the fallout of their decision. Instead of offering guidance, he insisted I “fix myself” and “straighten up.” It was clear he had no intention of seeing past his own judgment.
Jesus taught, “No greater love has a man than this: to lay down his life for his friends.” Yet not one person in the entire Southridge community was willing to speak up for me. After nine years of serving coffee, welcoming new faces, and faithfully contributing to the life of the church, I couldn’t find a single soul to stand by my side.
Even my friend Paul Glasbergen, who regularly told me he loved me, refused to speak on my behalf. When I asked him, he simply said, “God isn’t leading my heart to do that.”
The Bible teaches that failing to do what is right when you know you should is a sin (James 4:17). Yet none of my so-called friends were willing to do what was right.
A Heartbreaking Realization
How could I serve faithfully for nine years, yet find no one who loved me enough to stand up for me? What does that say about the love of Jesus that Southridge claimed to represent?
The truth hit me hard: if the people who claim to follow Christ cannot demonstrate even a fraction of His love, mercy, or power, what is there left to believe in?
Losing Faith
I no longer believe in Jesus Christ, though I still feel sorrow for Southridge Community Church. Their failure to embody the love they preached isn’t just heartbreaking–it’s tragic.
The people of a church are the only real evidence of the love, power, and authenticity of Jesus Christ. If they cannot demonstrate extraordinary love, why should anyone believe their testimony? Love that fails to rise above ordinary human behavior is no evidence of divine power.
Southridge failed me in every way that mattered. Their false testimony and lack of mercy revealed the true nature of their intentions: to use people like me–to take my time, money, and energy–until I was of no further use to them.
And yet, as painful as this experience was, the truth has finally set me free.
Thanks for reading my story.
– Don